Foremost, I mean
this with respect. It is challenging phrasing something on disrespecting
someone else without upsetting the main person, in my two cents, the chief
causes.
When something
falls, breaks, accept it as something that happens. Some swear, some complain,
but others determine—from reason: first, what to do at the moment; second, how
to prevent or lessen it happening again. Things will hit the fan; things will
be misunderstood; little things will occur. Ultimately, bad things happen. The
error is not in why, how or even that it still is happening; it is when we dwell
on it. Besides, it is annoying repeatedly bringing it up. Accept that it fell.
Move on.
Are there better
things to discuss than the faults of others? That is easy. There are less
shitty simpler minded topics to talk about: There are experiences, aspirations,
funny personal quirks about yourself, etc. (Read somewhere, the best truly funny
people make jokes about themselves—not others behind their back.) Anyway, the
point is that there are better options, and there are also different options
that can still bridge empathy, understanding and comradely.
Why do I care? When
others complain, incessantly, about how someone else is not perfect for their
job to other colleagues, that coworker has an ever bigger trouble. And down the
line, I will have more on my plate than what should be. It may not be much
more; I really don’t care. Except, words have affected her. Most gossip is useless.
The only
meaningful question here is, will you change; will she change? Else, can you
list three ways that loosely discrediting her will benefit anything?
Should clean up the high-horse tone, the diction needs to best suit its audience, the length to something short, and what else?
Wrote this off of trying to write an introduction about being a Stoic. It has been circling my mind for a while.
Though, this colleague will not get this message, it is a starting point for when this issue comes up again. It will happen. Expect it; do not necessarily accepting it.